Rule 54: Every drink you give a customer increases the likelihood of a sale by 10 percent. But it also increases the likelihood of a return by 15 percent.

Rule 258: If your carpet doesn’t need cleaning, then it wasn’t a real party.

Rule 301: If a guy is wearing a T-shirt that reads “I can’t be overdrawn, I still have checks left!”, don’t take his check.



This article originally appeared in the January 2017 edition of INVISION.

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