Overheard Optometry

14 Ridiculously Funny Things That Kids Actually Said at the Eye Doctor’s Office

“Are you allergic to anything?” “Poison.”

Published

1 year ago

August 14, 2018

As a child, going to any kind of doctor’s office is nerve-wrecking. You notice the latex gloves, red-capped eye drops, alcohol wipes and different metal tools, not to mention the smell of “exam room” everywhere you walk in the office.

So it’s no wonder that kids arrive to their eye exam appointments filled with mixed emotions. Some are curious, filled with questions for which doctors have no way to prepare ahead of time. Others react with horror to any sight of drops or gadgets. Some child patients even come to the office with words of wisdom for adults to live by.

Read below for 14 of our favorite stories of children at the eye doctor’s office, submitted by ECPs from all over. One thing’s for sure: Children are funny, curious and charming no matter where they live, or which doctor’s office they visit.

When the optometrist is no longer a doctor in this innocent child’s eyes, but a blatant traitor.

?Cardiff, Wales, UK ????????? • #overheardoptometry #cycloplegia #cycloplegicrefraction #pediatrics #kidssaythedarndestthings #optometryinwales
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Aug 6, 2018 at 8:59am PDT

I mean, she’s not lying …

?Houston, Texas, USA ?? • #overheardoptometry #poison #kidssaythedarndestthings #allergies #optometryintexas
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jul 17, 2018 at 6:00am PDT

Why haven’t we thought about this before?

?Virginia, USA ?? • #overheardoptometry #kidssaythedarndestthings #tears #optometryinvirginia
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jun 26, 2018 at 5:58pm PDT

Asking for a friend.

?Wales, UK ????????? • #overheardoptometry #eyepatch #eyeeyecaptain #optometryinwales
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jun 26, 2018 at 7:05am PDT

At least he’s too young to reveal this on Yelp.

?Sydney, Australia ?? • #overheardoptometry #cycloplegia #kidssaythedarndestthings #dilationdrops #optometryinaustralia
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jun 12, 2018 at 6:26pm PDT

How could Mom forget?

?Minnesota, USA ?? • #overheardoptometry #kidssaythedarndestthings #optometryinminnesota
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jun 10, 2018 at 6:20pm PDT

Think twice before you call your patient … err, patient’s eyes … lazy.

?Melbourne, Victoria, Australia ?? • #overheardoptometry #lazyeye #amblyopia #kidssaythedarndestthings #optometryinaustralia
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jun 7, 2018 at 7:49am PDT

He comes prepared.

?Dunedin, New Zealand ?? • #overheardoptometry #kidssaythedarndestthings #sungazing #optometryinnewzealand
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 6, 2018 at 6:18pm PDT

Dreams are broken at the optometrist’s office.

?Newbury, England, UK ????????? • #overheardoptometry #badsight #kidssaythedarndestthings #optometryinengland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Apr 16, 2018 at 2:10pm PDT

Creative jargon.

?Fort Wayne, Indiana, USA ?? • #overheardoptometry #pupils #pukeholes #optometryinindiana
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Apr 8, 2018 at 5:45pm PDT

I think this gets covered during second year of optometry school … right?

Kent, England, UK ????????? • #overheardoptometry #kidssaythedarndestthings #space #optometryinengland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Mar 21, 2018 at 2:25pm PDT

At least his sinuses are working!

?Manchester, New Hampshire, USA ?? • #overheardoptometry #covertest #delicious #optometryinnewhampshire
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Mar 7, 2018 at 7:40am PST

When life’s answers are revealed in the exam room.

?Melbourne, Victoria, Australia ?? • #overheardoptometry #stereopsis #3dglasses #3d #kidssaythedarndestthings #optometryinaustralia
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Feb 12, 2018 at 10:09am PST

When you decide there should be an age limit on when to show retinal photos to your
patients …

?St. Augustine, Florida, USA ?? • #overheardoptometry #optomap #optos #retinalphotography #bloodvessels #kidssaythedarndestthings #staugustine #florida #optometryinflorida
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jan 12, 2018 at 7:32am PST

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Overheard Optometry

10 Mind-Bending Things Overheard at the Eye Doctor’s Office

‘This is worse than a gynecology exam.’

Published

4 months ago

July 2, 2019

Elvira Derhovsepian

TO THE ECPS reading this: When you got into this field, did you really know what you were getting into? Sure, you trained for the technical and medical parts of the job. But the daily chit-chat can be quite a different story.

Did you anticipate the double-meanings behind each answer? Did you predict having to work as a psychologist in addition to being an eye doctor? Did you ever think you’d unintentionally dig deep into your patients’ lives and open a Pandora’s box of life stories?

Take a look into the stories our followers have documented and reported to Overheard Optometry over the past few months. See if you can relate to any of your fellow ECPs — or perhaps even the patients.

1. When you need to take a second glance at your life and make sure you are an optometrist, and not an obstetrician.

View this post on Instagram

Madison, Wisconsin, USA #overheardoptometry #dilation #delivery #dilationdrops #optometryinwisconsin
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 22, 2019 at 7:09am PDT

2. Or a psychologist. Wait, pull that chair back up. No you can’t lie down on it—are you serious?

View this post on Instagram

Anonymous location #overheardoptometry #clearvision #2020 #hindsight
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 26, 2019 at 9:07am PDT

3. When your optician is equipped with a request in one witty answer.

View this post on Instagram

Port Saint Lucie, Florida, USA #overheardoptometry #optical #optician #glasses #optometryinflorida
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 28, 2019 at 7:31am PDT

4. Or when you realize this optician and technician can be great friends.

View this post on Instagram

Grand Rapids, Michigan, USA #overheardoptometry #prostheticeye #optometryinmichigan
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 14, 2019 at 9:06am PDT

5. When the tables have turned and you become your patient’s patient.

View this post on Instagram

Northamptonshire, England, UK #overheardoptometry #opticnerve #fundus #optometryinengland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 11, 2019 at 8:35am PDT

6. Have you ever experienced a moment when you can’t say anything to make your patient feel better?

View this post on Instagram

St. Louis, Missouri, USA #overheardoptometry #gynecology #gynecologist #eyeexams #optometryinmissouri
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 8, 2019 at 7:51am PDT

7. Or thought about perfecting your poker face when you’re hit with statements like this?

View this post on Instagram

Northamptonshire, England, UK #overheardoptometry #varifocals #multifocals #presbyopia #optometryinengland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 7, 2019 at 8:34am PDT

8. Sometimes, it may just be better to nod and smile, or pretend you didn’t hear anything.

View this post on Instagram

Anonymous location #overheardoptometry #flask #eyeexamsarerough
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 4, 2019 at 9:36am PDT

9. Especially with comments like this…

View this post on Instagram

Trinidad #overheardoptometry #presbyopia #aging #optometryintrinidadandtobago
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Apr 25, 2019 at 7:49am PDT

10. When you’ve heard it all, it’s best to answer it as straightforwardly as this optometrist:

View this post on Instagram

South Africa #overheardoptometry #poorvision #contagious #eyes #optometryinsouthafrica
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Apr 16, 2019 at 6:26am PDT

Overheard Optometry

12 Overconfident Eyecare Patients Who Thought They Knew More Than the Doctor

‘I’ve always had unisex eyes!’

Published

4 months ago

June 18, 2019

Elvira Derhovsepian

WHEN YOU EMBARK on the journey to become an eyecare professional, you endure years of classroom and clinical training to be able to see patients on your own. You proffer your professional advice on eye health, write prescriptions, and generally make it your business to know what you’re doing.

But what about the moments when your patients can teach you a thing or two? It happens sometimes, no doubt. But other times, they come up with some pretty crazy stuff.

What would you do if your patients said the following?

1. Denial ain’t just a river, it’s apparently a drink too.

View this post on Instagram

St. Louis, Missouri, USA #overheardoptometry #blurryvision #dilationdrops #beers #optometryinmissouri
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jun 9, 2019 at 9:04am PDT

2. Stay tuned for the androgynous contacts, scheduled to be released next summer.

View this post on Instagram

Kansas, USA #overheardoptometry #unisex #contactlenses #optometryinkansas
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jun 4, 2019 at 8:09am PDT

3. Oh, honey…

View this post on Instagram

Darwin, Australia #overheardoptometry #manukahoney #dryeyes #optometryinaustralia
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 31, 2019 at 7:10am PDT

4. Perhaps it was on the “Popcorn” feature?

View this post on Instagram

Setúbal, Portugal #overheardoptometry #glasses #optical #optometryinportugal
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 9, 2019 at 6:29am PDT

5. Tap, still or sparkling?

View this post on Instagram

Northamptonshire, England, UK #overheardoptometry #dryeyes #water #optometryinengland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 6, 2019 at 6:37am PDT

6. Flipping minds and corneas alike.

View this post on Instagram

Grants Pass, Oregon, USA #overheardoptometry #cornea #cornealinjury #optometryinoregon
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 3, 2019 at 5:15am PDT

7. Meyend-blowing.

View this post on Instagram

Northhamptonshire, England, UK #overheardoptometry #contactlenses #dryeyes #naturalselection #optometryinengland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 2, 2019 at 7:50am PDT

8. Probably had it on “Heavy Wash”.

View this post on Instagram

Kamloops, British Columbia, Canada #overheardoptometry #dishwashersafe #glasses #optical #optician #optometryincanada
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 1, 2019 at 7:08am PDT

9. What kind of insect was that and where can we find it?

View this post on Instagram

Hermitage, Pennsylvania, USA #overheardoptometry #astigmatism #optometryinpennsylvania
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Apr 30, 2019 at 7:42am PDT

10. Glaucoma…gluten-free…tomato…tomahto.

View this post on Instagram

Melbourne, Victoria, Australia #overheardoptometry #glutenfree #glaucoma #visualfield #optometryinaustralia
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Apr 14, 2019 at 8:25am PDT

11. Isn’t it easier to pronounce the word with two syllables than the one with four?!

View this post on Instagram

St. Clairsville, Ohio, USA #overheardoptometry #obstetrician #optician #tomatotomato #optometryinohio
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Apr 12, 2019 at 7:53am PDT

12. No! Then all your logic would flow out of the holes. Don’t do that.

View this post on Instagram

Hampshire, England, UK #overheardoptometry #humphreyvisualfield #visualfield #eyepatch #optometryinengland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Apr 27, 2019 at 6:38am PDT

If you’d like to join the fun, subscribe to Overheard Optometry for daily stories like the ones above on Instagram and Facebook. You can also email your submissions here.

Overheard Optometry

18 Eyecare Patients Who Diagnosed Themselves and Were Incredibly Wrong

‘My eyes just hurt so bad. … It’s my stigmas.’

Published

6 months ago

April 16, 2019

Elvira Derhovsepian

THE HUMAN BODY IS complex, but the general public can at least point to the location of the heart, the stomach or the bicep muscles. If not, they at least have an idea of how to say the words.

The world of eyecare, however, presents its own intricate terminology. People don’t usually sprinkle their daily conversation with terms such as glaucoma, astigmatism, macular degeneration or cataracts.

Wouldn’t you rather be talking about guacamole? Stigmata? Molecular generation? Cadillacs?

Learning about the different parts of the eye is challenging, as many of our patients find. So here are our 18 favorite moments captured on Overheard Optometry with patients self-diagnosing themselves using creative ocular terminology.

1. Pretty sure there is no uterus in the eye. A for effort though.

View this post on Instagram

Anonymous location • #overheardoptometry #uterus #eye #bloodvessel
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Mar 8, 2019 at 6:31am PST

2. Not sure whether to be amazed or terrified.

View this post on Instagram

Manila, Philippines #overheardoptometry #weatherforecast #eyeweatherdetector #optometryinphilippines
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Mar 5, 2019 at 7:16am PST

3. Looks like we’re due for an anti-anti-reflective coating eye drop prescription.

View this post on Instagram

Prince Albert, Saskatchewan, Canada #overheardoptometry #allergic #glasses #antireflectivecoating #optometryincanada
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Feb 27, 2019 at 7:08am PST

4. Something tells me you probably shouldn’t use hand wipes from KFC for your eyes. Not sure what it is.

View this post on Instagram

Lancaster, England, UK #overheardoptometry #eroticheart #heartbeat #warfarin #arrhythmia #optometryinengland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Feb 26, 2019 at 6:18am PST

5. Unless your eyes are capable of inhaling then by all means, who are we to stop you?!

View this post on Instagram

Paris, France #overheardoptometry #asthma #astigmatism #inhaler #ventolin #optometryinfrance
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Mar 18, 2019 at 8:48am PDT

6. Hope this optometrist wasn’t trying to cushion the truth.

View this post on Instagram

Portugal #overheardoptometry #pillowmarks #optometryinportugal
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Mar 16, 2019 at 7:43am PDT

7. That escalated a tad bit too quickly.

View this post on Instagram

Los Angeles, California, USA #overheardoptometry #jaundice #ocular #optometryincalifornia
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Mar 15, 2019 at 7:35am PDT

8. Sounds like a case of blinker fluid.

View this post on Instagram

Mount Horeb, Wisconsin, USA #overheardoptometry #eyefluid #tears #vitreoushumor #whoknows #optometryinwisconsin
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Feb 13, 2019 at 6:46am PST

9. I don’t even know where to begin. Rugby ball? Pupil?

View this post on Instagram

Cape Town, South Africa #overheardoptometry #rugbyball #rugbyballpupil #astigmatism #optometryinsouthafrica
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Feb 2, 2019 at 7:06am PST

10. All this stigma about stigmas…makes me wonder why we’re talking about the Crucifixion? It’s just astigmatism!

View this post on Instagram

Texas, USA #overheardoptometry #astigmatism #stigma #optometryintexas
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jan 30, 2019 at 6:55am PST

11. Don’t try this at Japanese gardens. Leave the cod fish alone.

View this post on Instagram

Scotland #overheardoptometry #codliveroil #cataract #herbalremedies #cantmakethisshitup #optometryinscotland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jan 18, 2019 at 7:10am PST

12. Are you flippin’ kidding?

View this post on Instagram

Madrid, Spain #overheardoptometry #penguins #pinguecula #optometryinspain
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Mar 22, 2019 at 7:11am PDT

13. Watt are you talking about?

View this post on Instagram

High Point, North Carolina, USA #overheardoptometry #titanium #nickel #frames #lolwut #optometryinnorthcarolina
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Feb 15, 2019 at 7:32am PST

14. Sounds pretty flaky if you ask me.

View this post on Instagram

Bend, Oregon, USA #overheardoptometry #oliveoil #potatochips #eyeremedy #dryeyes #optometryinoregon
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Oct 21, 2018 at 9:59am PDT

15. That could have made a turn for the worst, really quickly.

View this post on Instagram

Richmond, England, UK #overheardoptometry #chlamydia #cataracts #optometryinengland
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Oct 18, 2018 at 7:15am PDT

16. Almond or soy?

View this post on Instagram

Manchester, New Hampshire, USA #overheardoptometry #coa #boiledmilk #milk #eyeremedy #dryeyes #optometryinnewhampshire
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Oct 12, 2018 at 5:41am PDT

17. Looks like we’re crossing over a new territory here…

View this post on Instagram

Anonymous location #overheardoptometry #religiouscataracts #catholics #cataracts
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Jun 22, 2018 at 6:05am PDT

18. Sounds like an eye-land in Greece.

View this post on Instagram

Burbank, California, USA #overheardoptometry #misakostakos #maculardegeneration #optometryincalifornia
A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on Mar 28, 2018 at 7:21am PDT

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14 Ridiculously Funny Things That Kids Actually Said at the Eye Doctor’s Office

When the optometrist is no longer a doctor in this innocent child’s eyes, but a blatant traitor.

I mean, she’s not lying …

Why haven’t we thought about this before?

Asking for a friend.

At least he’s too young to reveal this on Yelp.

How could Mom forget?

Think twice before you call your patient … err, patient’s eyes … lazy.

He comes prepared.

Dreams are broken at the optometrist’s office.

Creative jargon.

I think this gets covered during second year of optometry school … right?

At least his sinuses are working!

When life’s answers are revealed in the exam room.

When you decide there should be an age limit on when to show retinal photos to yourpatients …

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Overheard Optometry

10 Mind-Bending Things Overheard at the Eye Doctor’s Office

1. When you need to take a second glance at your life and make sure you are an optometrist, and not an obstetrician.

2. Or a psychologist. Wait, pull that chair back up. No you can’t lie down on it—are you serious?

3. When your optician is equipped with a request in one witty answer.

4. Or when you realize this optician and technician can be great friends.

5. When the tables have turned and you become your patient’s patient.

6. Have you ever experienced a moment when you can’t say anything to make your patient feel better?

7. Or thought about perfecting your poker face when you’re hit with statements like this?

8. Sometimes, it may just be better to nod and smile, or pretend you didn’t hear anything.

9. Especially with comments like this…

10. When you’ve heard it all, it’s best to answer it as straightforwardly as this optometrist:

Overheard Optometry

12 Overconfident Eyecare Patients Who Thought They Knew More Than the Doctor

1. Denial ain’t just a river, it’s apparently a drink too.

2. Stay tuned for the androgynous contacts, scheduled to be released next summer.

3. Oh, honey…

4. Perhaps it was on the “Popcorn” feature?

5. Tap, still or sparkling?

6. Flipping minds and corneas alike.

7. Meyend-blowing.

8. Probably had it on “Heavy Wash”.

9. What kind of insect was that and where can we find it?

10. Glaucoma…gluten-free…tomato…tomahto.

11. Isn’t it easier to pronounce the word with two syllables than the one with four?!

12. No! Then all your logic would flow out of the holes. Don’t do that.

Overheard Optometry

18 Eyecare Patients Who Diagnosed Themselves and Were Incredibly Wrong

1. Pretty sure there is no uterus in the eye. A for effort though.

2. Not sure whether to be amazed or terrified.

3. Looks like we’re due for an anti-anti-reflective coating eye drop prescription.

4. Something tells me you probably shouldn’t use hand wipes from KFC for your eyes. Not sure what it is.

5. Unless your eyes are capable of inhaling then by all means, who are we to stop you?!

6. Hope this optometrist wasn’t trying to cushion the truth.

7. That escalated a tad bit too quickly.

8. Sounds like a case of blinker fluid.

9. I don’t even know where to begin. Rugby ball? Pupil?

10. All this stigma about stigmas…makes me wonder why we’re talking about the Crucifixion? It’s just astigmatism!

11. Don’t try this at Japanese gardens. Leave the cod fish alone.

12. Are you flippin’ kidding?

13. Watt are you talking about?

14. Sounds pretty flaky if you ask me.

15. That could have made a turn for the worst, really quickly.

16. Almond or soy?

17. Looks like we’re crossing over a new territory here…

18. Sounds like an eye-land in Greece.

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