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True Tales

This Patient’s a Crazy Lady!

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Our new doctor walked in on me as I was using the lensometer and asked me about the patient I was helping. I told him the patient was crazy, very psychotic, and always whining. I asked if he’d take a look at her as she claimed she was having trouble with her glasses, and I warned him one more time that she was crazy. Then I went up front and I said, “Mom, come on back with the doctor, he’ll have a look at you.” You should have seen his face! Good way to welcome the new doc to our office. —  Jeff Grosekemper, Casa De Oro Eyecare, Spring Valley, CA


This article originally appeared in the July-August 2017 edition of INVISION.

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True Tales

Something Got Lost in Translation During This Exam

And the OD suffered a finger in an unexpected place.

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A LOST IN TRANSLATION story: A Spanish speaking patient and I were doing quite well getting through the exam despite not speaking each other’s language fluently. I tugged my right ear, saying look at my ear for my slit lamp work. She promptly reached over, figuring she was performing as told, and stuck her finger in my ear! Lost in translation I guess. — Brian Parker, OD, Temecula Eye Center, Temecula, CA

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True Tales

Could You Keep Your Cool if a Roach Joined You in the Exam Room?

It happened to this doc. See how he reacted.

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YEARS AGO, when I worked at a commercial practice, I was refracting a patient. I was standing to her right and spinning the dials when I looked down and noticed a cockroach sitting on her shoulder. Without a pause, I moved the near point rod down and gently placed my hand on her shoulder, at the same time flicking the roach onto the wall behind her. I completed the exam and the patient didn’t have a clue as to what transpired. — Mark Perry, OD, Vision Health Institute, Orlando, FL

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True Tales

You Should See What See Keeps in the Other Box Under Her Bed

Curiously weak lashes!

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WE HAD A PATIENT who was worried that she was losing her eyelashes too rapidly … so she collected them all in a little Altoids box and whipped it out under the doctor’s nose while in the exam lane. She wanted the doc to look at the discarded hairs “to see if there’s any issues.” The doctor politely informed her that “everything looks normal!” We still haven’t figured out how she collected that many eyelashes. — Jen Heller, Pend Oreille Vision Care, Sandpoint, ID

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