12 Embarrassing True Tales from the ‘Opticians on Facebook’ Group

IF MISERY LOVES company, than embarrassment loves a party! On a recent thread on Opticians on Facebook, a member by the name of Teresa D. shared her most embarrassing moment at work and asked for her fellow ECPs to post their own. In need of a good chuckle? We’ve rounded up just a fraction of the most red-faced and cringy tales for your enjoyment:

• “One patient we have is soo good looking and soo sweet I embarrass myself regularly when he comes in. We see him pretty often because he’s applying for a government job that needs him to get an eye exam every time he applies in a different office. Last time he told me that it’s looking good, but he was sad he wouldn’t be visiting us every couple of months and I told him that if he wanted to visit us he could poke himself in the eye. I IMMEDIATELY retracted and laughed and said ‘No! I’m sorry please don’t poke yourself in the eye,’ and he looked at me like I’m crazy and said, ‘Or I could just stop in and say hi because I live near here, right?’ Then he winked at me and I was done. I feel like finishing all the stupid things I say when he’s in for an appointment with ‘Noooo! I’m smart dammit!’” — Julia F.
• “Poked someone in the eye with a marker and said BOOOOP as I did it.” — Cassidy B.
• “As a 20-something young man sitting face to face with a wealthy mature female patient, I was attempting to make small talk while cleaning new glasses I was dispensing and I said the following: ‘My ironing board cover has the same patterns and is made out of the same material as your dress.’ It was true. I don’t know why but it was at least similar. I witnessed the look of horror on her face as she decided whether I was being mean or if I was stupid and realized my blunder. In order to save myself I blurted ‘I really like my ironing board cover.’ Thirty years later I still cringe when I think about it.” — William V.
• “One time I mixed up ‘chart’ and ‘file’ and I said, ‘I’ll be right back with your fart!”” — Robyn L.
• “I was doing a CL I&R on a guy, he was fumbling with the lens. I told him ‘Get it wet and wiggle it a bit before you put it in.’ He laughed and asked if my husband knows I talk to the patients like that!” — Carol D.
• “Guy came in for a repair when I was new to optics. Told him our screws were free. Then I said, ‘I think I will just crawl under this counter now.’ Without missing a beat, he replied, ‘Is that where you do it?’” — April C.
• “One time I was trying to tell a patient and her daughter that the doctor would probably squeeze her in because he has a soft spot for kids. Instead I said ‘He likes little girls.’ I have never been more embarrassed in my life!” — Amanda W.
• “I told a one eyed woman I’d keep an eye out for her.” — Annie P.
• “I was sick. Like cough and cold sick. My boss/doctor was too and it was just he and I. I’m helping a lady and her son is running around. I coughed and farted at the same and the little boy was RIGHT behind me. I was mortified and even worse, he said in his little kid voice ‘Oooh mommy, she forted.’ I died. My boss left the front desk from having a laughing/coughing attack.” — Cas F.
• “We have two clinics and I don’t work at the other one too often so I don’t have the number memorized. I was leaving a message and said ‘Hi this is blah blah vision clinic calling to let you know your glasses are in, please call…” [freaking out cause I didn’t know the number] *giggled* … then said ‘I don’t normally work here so I don’t know the number… I hope you do, bye.’” — Kaiti K.
• “While helping a patient with a frame selection, I reached forward with my hands to remove the frame and she started to move as well. My pinky nail went up her nose, then I happened to say, ‘I think we just picked a good one’” — Karen O.
• “You know how patients sometimes use ‘frames’ and ‘lenses’ in the wrong context? Well, this guy was looking at frames and we were talking about frames and lenses and his Rx. He was talking about needing special ones and he goes ‘Well I have a….’ and he stopped like he couldn’t think of how to say it and I go ‘A big head?’ He stares at me blankly and says ‘A cornea transplant.’ We we’re clearly talking about two different things and I nearly DIED.” — Denise M.

If you’re a member of the group and would like to read more, or share your own, click here.