SEPT

20

Bow down before a living eyewear legend on SOPHIA LOREN’S 80TH BIRTHDAY. Loren’s heart-stopping curves and sultry eyes have helped make her a symbol of glamour for more than 60 years. Since her first starring role in 1953’s Aida, women around the world have imitated Loren’s fashion style — including her flamboyantly cool eyewear and sunwear. Loren is even said to have been the first celebrity to have her own eyewear brand. Loren-style eyewear and movie pin-up pix would make a fine window display or online shrine to commemorate this lovely lady.

SEPT

18

One of the world’s biggest eye shows, VISION EXPO WEST, is here, and with hundreds of exhibitors, it’s a daunting event to work. Don’t fret: Turn to page 52 for dozens of tips to help you get the most from your VEW experience.

SEPT

19

Arrrggh, already. It be the year’s dumbest holiday: TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY. For some reason — Johnny Depp, maybe? though columnist Dave Barry gets credit — this event continues to grow. One way to help stop its spread? When a customer enters your business with a contorted face, hand held like a hook, grunting out streams of pirate-y language, gasp sharply, stand up straight, and respond — while looking extremely offended — “Scurvy? That’s no laughing matter, sir (or madam).” Let it hang for a few seconds before telling them you’re kidding. Small steps, friends, small steps.

SEPT

25

It’s NATIONAL ONE-HIT WONDER DAY, the day for musical acts whose careers enjoyed hype and roaring crowds, only to retreat into shadowy anonymity about a week-and-a-half later. Have a “one-hit wonder” sale on discontinued eyewear lines. Cater it with one-bite snacks and spin a soundtrack with flash-in-the-pan tunes including Los del Rio (Macarena), Dexys Midnight Runners (Come On, Eileen) and Carl Douglas (Kung Fu Fighting).

SEPT

26

Didn’t go to Vision Expo West? It must have been because you were waiting to fly to Paris to attend SILMO, the European mega-fair running through the 29th. The show offers the latest technologies and mind-blowing designs from brand names filled with accents and umlauts. And did we mention that it’s in, you know, Paris? Don’t miss the chance to enjoy indescribable wine, cheese, bread and pastries and dust off your high-school French. (“Ou est la salle de bain?”)

OCT

2

“As today is the second of October, I shall be due in London on the 21st of December or else £20,000 will belong to you.” Mark PHILEAS FOGG’S WAGER DAY with a Jules Verne-like challenge: Give your staff 80 days to meet a seemingly unreachable sales target. (Actually, you may want to give them 83 days — it’ll be Christmas Eve by then.)

OCT

9

Ahead of BUILD YOUR BUSINESS WITH BUSINESS CARDS WEEK, challenge your staff to see how many they can hand out during the seven-day period. Winner gets a free carwash — from you. In a bathing suit. (But only if that doesn’t seem weird.) If you need some inspiration for cool new cards, check out our recent article at invmag.us/9141.

OCT

31

HALLOWEEN offers a great chance to let loose. Dress up and have a selection of the three Cs: chocolates, candy and carrot sticks (for the kids). Seriously: Who could be intimidated buying eyeglasses from Captain America, Maleficent or the cast of Duck Dynasty?

INVISION Staff

Since launching in 2014, INVISION has won 23 international journalism awards for its publication and website. Contact INVISION's editors at editor@invisionmag.com.

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